August 06, 2010

the tug ... (Jeju pt II)

(This is the second part in the multi part saga that was Jeju Island.)

Security at the airport was shockingly easy to get through. I was able to walk through with my shiny weapons of above average Korean size (cruthches), without issue. Security never even checked my bag; I had a giant thawing gel icepack buried between clothes. Not to mention the full bottle of water strapped to the side. I love Korea! The airport also sold beer by the can, tall can, 1 litre bottle, and 1.5 litre mini pitcher. ALL at the same prices found anywhere in the city. Hmm, I’ll miss Korea when I’m gone.

The flight was short; the landing was speedy and bouncy. The first destination on Jeju was the historic theme park built by two university students, LOVELAND. Loveland is a sex theme park, there are statues of people fucking, there are giant penis’ everywhere, and even the door handles to the bathrooms were glorified boobs and cocks. The signs were kinky, the fountain was… well cuming… The park was essentially a photo op, and every adult in the park had a childish grin. Much like actual children when they see a statue of Mickey Mouse, and no, before the question is asked, there was not a statue of Mickey giving it to Minnie.

My knee wasn’t holding up that great after the plane and frolic through Loveland. It was aching and swollen. I knew then that my knee wasn’t on vacation as well, it brought all of it’s muscle torn drama with it.

Transportation on the island was about as good as it gets. The island was a lot larger than any of us had anticipated. Yet it was still relatively easy to get around. The whole island was tied together through a simple network of buses. The buses ran, sped, and slammed the brakes rather frequently. The bus drivers were all attempting to audition for the Korean Gran Prix. F1 cars aren’t required to pick up passengers, and buses are. This is something a couple of the daydreaming drivers forgot when they slammed on the brakes 15 feet past a bus stop.

We stayed in a cheap hostel in a city called Seogwipo. The hostel was nice, the AC in my room didn’t work, thus making the fan even more of a lifesaver. Speaking of saving lives, or safety features, the fan was equipped with a 2 hour timer. The hostel was doing its part to save people from the fan chopping up the oxygen molecules in the middle of the night (if that confuses you, read my fan death post).

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